Vazquez Counseling

I am going to state something that should cause you to recoil. This is by no means a true statement, but many men down through history have believed it, to the detriment of all humanity. The statement is this: women are second class citizens, and they should be treated as such.

If that statement caused you consternation, whether you are a man or a woman, then you understand that the complete opposite of that statement is what should be. So, now, I’ll state the opposite, and please let it sit with you: Women should be loved, honored, and respected, no matter what. There, much better, right?

Why do you think that down through the ages, many men have felt that women are beneath them? I would say that it comes from a basic ignorance or a misunderstanding of some of our most ancient writings. I have worked with many women in my counseling practice for over 24 years, and in that time, I have come to understand their needs, their wants, and why they should be honored. I am by no means an expert on the subject, because I am not a woman, but I have been an advocate for women my whole career.

Let’s look at some Scriptures for the Truth about women that God teaches. In Genesis 2:18, the Bible declares:

“And the LORD God said, ‘It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.’” (from the New King James Version)

It is vitally important that we understand the meaning of words in the Bible in their original languages. In this all-important verse, where the idea of the woman is first introduced by God, I would like to focus on the words, “helper” and “comparable.”

What I have realized over my many years of studying the Bible in depth is that most people don’t understand the full meaning of these words. If men down through history had truly understood and believed what God meant in this verse, things would have been much different for women.

Let’s first consider the word “comparable.” In the original Hebrew, the word is “neg̱eḏ,” and it literally means: what is conspicuous, in front of, straight forward, before, in sight of, or parallel. What God is ultimately stating with this word is that the woman was meant to come alongside the man as an equal, of the same essence, literally in front of him, and to be with him, so that he would not be alone.

Now, let’s consider the word, “helper.” In the original Hebrew, the word is “‘êzer,” which is derived from the word “‘âzar,” and it means one who helps, or one who protects. Another word that can assist us in defining “helper” is “succour,” which is a noun that means, “assistance in times of hardship or distress.”

Now, let’s take a look at another version of the word “helper” that appears later in the Scriptures. In John 14:15-18, Jesus said the following,

“If you love Me, keep My commandments. And I will pray the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may abide with you forever— the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees Him nor knows Him; but you know Him, for He dwells with you and will be in you. I will not leave you orphans; I will come to you.” (NKJV)

In this passage, we find the word, “Helper,” again, but this time it is capitalized, for Jesus was referring to the Holy Spirit. Here, the original Greek word for “Helper” is “paraklētos.” The word here means much more than someone who aids; it means someone who will advocate for you, someone who has been called to your side to guide you, and someone who empowers you to do good.

So, as the Word of God states, God created the woman as a parallel companion to the man, someone who is an equal, and someone who not only helps a man, but who advocates for him and guides him. The word “helper” in Hebrew (the original language in the Old Testament) and in Greek (the original language of the New Testament) is a word that is supposed to bring us great comfort, as it points us directly to the work of the Holy Spirit in our lives.

As we conclude our study of these words, I’ll ask you one question. Knowing all of this about what “comparable” and “helper” actually mean, do you believe that there is any reason at all to denigrate women? I believe that down through the centuries, many men have allowed the curse of sin to cloud their view of what God has called women to be in our lives and how special they are in His heart. A correct view of women can only lead us to conclude that they should always be loved, honored, and respected.

In my life, the woman whom God provided in my life, my beautiful Wife Laura, has been of great help to me. It is she who helps ground me when I want to run ahead of God. I have shared the mission that our LORD has called for me to do with Laura, and she offers me unwavering support. She often exhorts me to wait on the LORD to open doors and close doors for me, and she helps me to discern what steps I should take, as I walk the path that God has laid out for me. She has truly come alongside me to protect me, probably mostly from myself. I cannot imagine living my life without Laura, whom our LORD has given me, my advocate who has demonstrated to me that she loves me unconditionally. I’m sure all of you men to whom God has given a beautiful and wonderful helper understand exactly what I’m talking about.